Saudade is the recollection of feelings, experiences, places or events that once brought excitement, pleasure, well-being, which now triggers the senses and makes one live again. It can be described as an emptiness, like something or someone that should be there in a particular moment is missing, and the individual feels this absence.

An idea that suits me right now.

Nerding Out in Germany

So, although my Sunday stared off late due to the fact that I remained behind at Israel's birthday party to clean up and then had to walk home (with some other friends, so I wasn't alone), I had a pretty fun Sunday. Not much happened, especially not the laundry I hoped to accomplish, but none the less, it was a good day. I walked into town with Alexis only to get a cup of coffee (which I ended up wearing half of when i spilled it on my lap) and some crisp cool air. Then I rushed home to prepare myself for a night of socializing, eating and, Dungeons and Dragoning. That's right, friends, Rachel is a full-pledged D&D player now. To some, it's old news (I know a fair many now in SSU....cough cough, Brandon and all the guys!). To other's, it probably makes sense that I would eventually discover that which is fantasy mixed with theater. What a combo, huh?

I wont give you all the details, but just so you can appreciate my new alter-ego, I am a Chaotic Good, human bard. My adventuring gang and I all live in the arctic tundra of Icewinddale (AKA Arschkalt, for those who want to translte, its "Asscold" in German haha). Tonight, we all met in the Whale Troller Bar (one of my favorite bars in the area, one of which I am well known at) and we all set off on an quest to free a dwarf king from some nasty folk in the ice caves somewhere.

Here's hoping we all survive!

It's been quite an adventure since last I updated. Mike, Chelsea, Israel and I went on a two week adventure to Italy before University started. First, Milan. We stayed with a missionary family that Israel knew and slept about their church for three nights while we explored Milan. It had a beautiful and impressive Duomo (cathedral) but on the last day we were there, we actually got to see The Last Supper (very impressive!). After changing some travel scheduling we made our way to Venice. To me, Venice was the most beautiful city we saw. With it's small water ways, bridges and narrow cobbled walkways, Venice gave me the feeling of what old Italy might have felt like. It was there that I bought some Morano glass necklaces for some friends, and where I bought (and unfortunatlyu lost) a Venician tie that I bought for Brandon. It also rained really hard on us one night, and that same night we opted to sleep at the train station. All in all, Venice was awesome. Our next train at 8 am took us all the way down to Rome. We spent the next three days in a small hostel outside of town, taking the train in every morning and night. In Rome, we saw not only the Colosseum, but the Moses statue, The Trivi fountain (tossed a coin over our shoulder too), the Roman Forum, the Old Roman Road (and with it some beautiful sights of the Roman country side), the Catacombs, a castle, and naturally, The Vatican City, St.
peter's Basilica and The Sistine Chapel. My favorite part of Rome was after a violent wind storm and a half hour of rain, the sky cleared up and in doing so, casted two perfect rainbows over the Colosseum. I don't think I have ever seen something so magical and beautiful before. It was awesome. However, I think the least favorite part was leaving my change purse (with my last 90 euros in it) at the Vatican post office. Never found it again, and although we only have a few more days left in Italy, it put a little damper on my day. But, money is only money, so, i couldn't be that upset. Our last trip was Florence, where we stayed with our friend Matt from Sonoma who was studying there. He introduced us to his really nice roommates and we spent a day and a half exploring Florence. It's a beautiful city and I liked seeing the David statue replics even if we never saw the origional. We also walked up a ton of stairs on the outskirts of the city and found a beautiful look out spot on the whole city from above. That was absolutely breath-taking!

But coming back to Germany was amazing. I had missed the language, the culture, the people, and the bread! Haha, but yea, I'm back in Tubingen, happy for both my adventure and now having my own bed to sleep in again. Just looking forward to the year ahead of me and all that can and will be possible.

Love you all, thanks for always reading what I write!

Day before Italy

One word to sum up my Italian prepared-ness: Nervous! Never had I had to plan, organize and execute quite a large adventure before! I am extremely thankful to have along the company of my sister, Mike and Israel. I know Mike will will the backbone of the adventure and I trust him to keep me safe and sound while abroad!

I suppose I shouldn't be so nervous. Italy is one of the world's most beautiful countries. People dream their whole lives of seeing such a place. I'm thrilled at having such an opportunity to be there myself!

Day be day I don't feel like I'm changing very much. But already, in two months I have had a bigger adventure than any in my life. By the end of this year, I feel like I'll be more worldly and open-minded than I ever had previously. It's exciting. And tests my comfort zones. Maybe it'll break a few of them. Who knows. =)

My blog will be absent for a few days, check back with me on October 19th. I'll have been to Italy and have started my first day of German classes at the university!

Today I enjoyed a day of "getting life figured out." A little unpacking. A little decorating. Socializing with Alexis and Chelsea. Grocery shopping with Chelsea and Mike. Tonight I'm having folks over for dinner and possibly a game of Yahtzee.

After unpacking my groceries, claiming space in the cupboards, organizing my Kuhlschrank (refrigerator) and cleaning my sink, I received a light knock on my door. My dorm mate, Johannis wanted to see how I was adjusting. We talked (in Deutsch, of course) about having a dorm room "meet and greet" night with everyone. Then Andy (also from Deutschland) came out of his room and we had coffee all together in the kitchen. It was a nice and relaxing afternoon. Meeting my dorm mates made me enjoy the place I'll be calling "home" even more. They seem like a group of pretty cool cats, so I'm looking forward to having them around.

Tubingen is a great city. It's big and is just hectic enough to be interesting and fun. :] It's the most interesting city I've ever lived in, and, I think, the city with so much to offer. I'm very happy with my decision to study abroad, because I feel like I'm going to get a lot out of it. Memories. A better perspective on the world. I've laughed. I've cried. I've been confused. And I've relished in the simplest of moments (getting on the right bus and getting off at the right stop, all by myself!).

I haven't been everywhere. But it's on my list. :]

The start of something new

Monday morning I took my luggage to the car of my guest family. My guest mother, who has become a very special person to me, told me she cried when she read my Thank You card. She packed me some extra blankets, silverware and snow jackets and told me to visit often. Weekends, weekdays. When I have friends visit me in Tubingen, when I have a husband and children someday. I never realized but she has opened her whole heart, house and life to me whenever I come visit.

We took the bus all the way to Tubingen. 40 minutes away. We dropped Israel off first, but I didnt worry but he's pretty good on his own. Then we dropped off the group of students living in the French Quarter. Me, Michael and Chelsea included. After wrestled with the key in the door, I walked into the common room (more like hallway) of the wohnzimmer (dorm) that I'll be in for the next year. First impression: oh, jeez. The hallway was dirty, messy and smelled of tater tots. The kitchen was ever messier, and the bathroom was small and dirty. At first, I made the same assumption of my own little room. Rectangular, high ceilings, while walls, wood floor, dusty. But after today's run to Kaufland (supermarket similar to a Target, but with less variety), I purchased scented tea lights, colored paper and markers. I'm going to busy for the next few days, making art to decorate my walls.

The city in Tubingen is beautiful. We all think so. My favorite thing to do it grab a friend and explore the city. I don't even know how big it is, but I haven't seen it all yet. Today, Israel and I walked up the hill to the castle. It was beautiful. Oh, and did I mention that the guy who discovered DNA found it in a kitchen in that very same castle? We then made our way into town along some back streets. We found a gamer's shop on the corner called Fantasy Empire. When Brian comes to visit, he simply has to see it. Comic books, games, books, dice.

After our exploration, a few friends and I went to dinner on the Market Strasse. It was an unlikely bunch of us. A few friends that I never got to see unless at school. But this time, we got to enjoy a few hours of dinner, conversation and late-night walking. We ate dinner in the middle of the Market Strasse in front of the Rat Haus (City Hall). Surrounded by beautifully old buildings and a dark and starry sky, I couldn't help but imagine the day when Brandon and I get to stroll along these streets together. I sure do miss that guy a lot.

My day ended with internet finally connected in my dorm room. Thank goodness. Connection to my friends and family. I had miss you all so much in the last week. It has been nice to have you back. And internet meant that I got to call Brandon. We talked for an hour, and I couldn't help but be thankful for that amount of time.

So, tonight, happy and content, I sleep once again in my new bed, in my new city, new dorm and the new life that awaits me for this year.